As many couples are, we were very focused on the impending birth of our baby and committed to attempting to achieve a natural birth. We were not initially considering having a birth attendant, but after our birth classes we were convinced that it would help us achieve our goal.

We met Stephanie when I was about 36 weeks pregnant, at that stage we had not written out our birth plan, so she discussed some of the ideas we had and provided us with some sample birth plans which really helped us sort through what we wanted for our own labour. She also left us with some books to read. All of these things helped us build up knowledge about the process, and gave us confidence in ourselves to follow our plans.

Of course, as they do, plans change and my waters broke at 37.5 weeks and labour needed to be induced due to a positive Group B Strep result. This resulted in being on continuous monitoring and attached to a drip. Gone were the plans of using water – either bath or shower – which I’ve heard is fantastic during labour. (Maybe next time I’ll get to experience that).

Throughout this time when the medical decisions were being made to induce etc, Stephanie was a constant support. She was able to remind us of our initial plans and gave us confidence to question, some of the procedures being put in place. She did this in a way that empowered us, so that we could regain some sense of control over the medical process. eg, getting the Syntocinon started and maintained at a lower dose.

We now reflect back and although having a plan is important, it is equally important to know when to let go of some parts of it. Even more significant is a knowledge of the medical processes and to have someone to support your decisions. Stephanie helped to provide both of these for us.

Stephanie was also a fantastic help for the more physical aspects of labour. As I was not able to use the shower, Stephanie tirelessly rubbed ice on my back during contractions – I’m surprised she didn’t get frostbite!, and her massage relieved the tension between contractions.

This help never got in the way of Stuart and his role as my main support person, in fact it enhanced it, as Stephanie was able to do these things while Stuart could be closer to me as an emotional support. Stephanie was the one who remembered to offer me drinks and remind me to go to the toilet – she even got our camera out towards the end to capture the birth itself, and took the first pictures of our gorgeous baby girl.

In the last stages of labour, I was finding it difficult to direct my pushing. It was Stephanie’s suggestion, that I place my hand on my baby’s head while I pushed, in order to make the connection between my pushing efforts and her movement. This made all the difference, and very soon after, our baby girl was born.

Both Stuart and I agree that we couldn’t have done without Stephanie, and the fact that I managed to avoid pain relief was in a large part due to her. Because we had the confidence to question the medical authority, we feel that our labour was on our terms, and a much more amazing and rewarding experience.

Emma, Stuart & Hanna – 2007